Must reads to recognize & heal complex ptsd
Why it’s so hard to be nice to yourself
You’ve heard the importance of being nice to yourself. But a voice in your head won’t let you give yourself the care and compassion you need to thrive.
How to know when chemistry is a trauma bond
Did a parent make you feel as though you had to strive to win their love? This primes you to feel attraction or trauma bond to people who treat you the same.
Cycle breaker: what it means and how to become one
You may have seen the term cycle breaker on Instagram and other media. It refers to someone challenging past generational patterns so they can live differently.
How accepting their limitations will set you free
Have you ever been told to “let go” of resentment over how a family member treated you? Rather than letting go I suggest accepting their limitations instead.
The problem with "they did the best they could"
I’ve noticed a pattern among childhood trauma survivors. And that’s how quickly they rush to defend the parents who failed to give them what they needed.
What is parentification and how to know if it applies
Parentification takes place when the needs of the parent come before those of the child. It results in a role reversal where the child takes on responsibilities that should belong to the parent.
How to understand the freeze response and its purpose
Have you been in situations where looking back you should have felt intense fear but instead felt nothing? Did you minimize or deny rather than assess the circumstance accurately?
3 myths about boundaries and how to navigate them
When you start healing from dysfunctional family dynamics, you learn the importance of setting boundaries. But those lessons from well-meaning people often re-inforce myths about boundaries that hinder your progress.
How to parent when you have complex PTSD
I’ve received countless questions about the challenges of being a parent with complex PTSD. How do you avoid making the same mistakes your parents did?
How to stop dimming your light and 3 reasons you do
Do you ever dim your light or play small in order to feel accepted by others? Have you ever pretended to be less than what you really are because you had the feeling that belonging meant dumbing that down?
How to not should on yourself while you heal
Tara Brach is a mindfulness teacher and psychologist who says when you should on yourself, you argue with reality. The word ‘should’ shows a lack of acceptance and a disconnection with yourself.
How to overcome avoidance strategies as coping mechanisms
If you grew up with unmet childhood needs, you may have adopted avoidance strategies as a way to cope. Instead of facing the issue head on, you distracted yourself from it.
How to get over feeling like you don't belong
Feeling like you don’t belong can be linked to adverse events in childhood. If you felt forced to suppress your own needs to win the love and acceptance of your caregivers, you never felt celebrated for your authentic self.
How to stop feeling triggered about being responsible for healing
Have you been told you’re responsible for healing after trauma? For example, someone says it’s not your fault what happened to you, but it’s your responsibility to heal from it.
How to know you have a narcissistic mother wound
When Christina Crawford wrote about her abusive mother, Joan, in Mommie Dearest, several celebrities came out in defense of the actress.